Hero Dog

Well, it looks like blogging about SYTYCD is not going to work out this week. I was away, then I was un-being-away (unpacking, etc.), then our power went out and is supposed to be out until tomorrow morning. What joy is ours.

So if you want SYTYCD stuff, see my sister’s post. And while you’re here, read my story of my hero dog.

I saw this and it got me upset, because I didn’t get a chance to nominate our Curly. So I will tell the story of his heroism to the two of my readers who’ve never heard me natter on about this before.

My mom has a townhouse on the Jersey shore. It’s not in a ritzy area at all, and it sort of borders marshland, so there’s always lots of wildlife around. One particular year there was a sort of family of ducks that hung around the parking lot of the complex – one female and two males. (And who are you to say that’s not a family, by duck standards? Or any standards?) And of course they were terrified of Curly whenever he came out for a walk, especially because Curly was notorious for not understanding that not every creature in the world wanted to befriend his big, galumphing self.

Then one day, my mom saw this family of ducks, and then she saw a gang of male ducks attacking them. Some of them were holding the two males off while another (or some others) were attempting to rape the female duck. So my mom leashed up Curly and brought him outside, where he made a big ruckus and scared the gang of rapist ducks away.

And from that day forward, that family of ducks wouldn’t fly off in fear when they saw Curly. They wouldn’t, like, cozy up to him and lie against his belly or anything, but they definitely recognized that Curly was a friend.

Now, when I tell this story, people generally look at me like I’m a nut. But it turns out that ducks really are incredibly prone to rape. Duck genitals are designed to either be able to successfully rape a female (and impregnate her) or to expel unwanted sperm from rapists.

Those of you who know me (all of you) might expect me to start a long treatise here about animal sexual behavior and the total nonsense that is evolutionary psychology. But that is not what I’m here for today. Today, my point is, Curly was a hero, and deserves to be honored.

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