SAGs 2015

Kate: So at the end of our Golden Globes post when I said we’d be back for the Oscars, I totes forgot about the SAG Awards and the Grammys. Shame on me!

Erica: And I forgot to Tivo it. So I’m using photos to judge the outfits. Not as accurate, I’m afraid.

Kate: Let’s get right to it.

 

Amy Poehler

sag 2015 amy poehler

Kate: Pretty, very Amy, but hold on — is she pregnant? Were we right about that with the blue dress at the Golden Globes?

Erica: Now, I’m only looking at pictures; I missed the telecast. But I’m voting…Yes? Pregnant? Because normally she’s kinda boxy, so I can’t imagine that she’s just gaining weight in a round shape on her tummy.

Kate: If she’s not pregnant again, I feel extremely mean saying that, but it looks like a very pronounced bump (from the side) that she is purposely showing off. What are we supposed to think, Amy?!?

Erica: I honestly don’t think we’re being mean because she doesn’t look fat, she looks pregnant. And a quick Google search indicates that we’re not the only ones wondering. Either way, she looks great. Did the dress look midnight blue during the telecast? Because at first I thought it was black, and, black, this dress is lovely and more feminine and glam than her usual looks and I am in favor. In midnight blue, I am in majorly more favor.

Kate: Methinks midnight blue.

 

Anna Chlumksy

sag 2015 anna chlumsky

Kate: Well I guess she got rid of that baby weight, dayum Anna! …On second thought, she actually looks too skinny, way skinnier than usual. What happened, Anna?

Erica: I think her weight looks alright; I’m not loving the dress.

Kate: This is a dress I wouldn’t normally like, but it looks very good on her. Perhaps needed one more inch off the hem, though.

Erica: She kind of looks uncomfortable. That “What am I doing here?” look we sometimes see on stars who don’t know they’re stars.

Kate: I do wish she would change up the hair a little — another blowout for the red carpet? We can do better, Vada Sultenfuss.

Erica: Can I tell you, I have legit reasons for not changing my last name when I got married that having nothing to do with Anna Chlumsky, but I also have Anna Chlumsky-related reasons? Because in My Girl 2, when she’s trying to find her dead mom’s high school friends, she keeps running into walls because they got married and changed their last names. So, you know, if one of my high school friends dies and her daughter comes looking, I want her to be able to find me.

 

Claire Danes

 sag 2015 claire danes

Erica: Nope.

Kate: WAY better than the Golden Globes. Way. (Ignoring those scales on the sides.)

Erica: Are you also ignoring the color, the cut and the BELT? Which doesn’t even look like a belt; it looks like something you’d use to fasten the duffel bag you’re taking to sleepaway camp in 1992?

Kate: Ok I am ignoring the scales on the sides and also the belt. I like the color, and I love her hair that way.

Erica: Yeah, her hair looks nice.

 

Danielle Brooks

sags 2015 Danielle Brooks

Kate: Oh my gosh she looks so pretty.

Erica: Taystee? Holy moly she looks awesome.

Kate: Excellent choice for her, very elegant, I love the color and her hair and makeup and accessories. The dress was pulled a little too tight in the belly area, but otherwise perfect.

Erica: Gorgeous color, great shape, love the one-shoulder thing, and her hair and makeup are pure class.

 

Emilia Clarke

sags 2015 Emilia Clarke

Kate: So this looks like an extraordinarily well-made dress and nice and everything, but it’s overall just a little boring for me. I do not like the two-tonedness of it.

Erica: I really totally hate the two-toned thing. And these particular two tones? Dark blue and black? I mean, do I really need to explain what’s wrong with this? Look, people, you can mix neutrals, but you have to be careful. It’s almost never acceptable to mix two DARK neutrals, okay?

Kate: There also seems to be a kind of half-cape thing in the back, which I get is very Khaleesi, but I do not like it.

Erica: She should just dress like Khaleesi all the time. Khaleesi has style.

Kate: I have a Khaleesi bracelet!

 

Emma Stone

sags 2015 emma stone

Kate: No Emma. No.

Erica: I feel like, I get it. I get what this was supposed to be. It’s just…It’s not good.

Kate: I tried to get behind her Globes look, but I cannot with this. It takes “menswear” 70 steps too far. Worst dressed nominee.

Erica: I love her very much but I almost never like her red carpet looks.

 

Felicity Jones

sags 2015 Felicity Jones

Kate: Best dressed nominee. Amazingly chic and elegant. She is rocking her red carpet debut season.

Erica: She looks darling.

Kate: But I still need to see her movie, dangit.

Erica: Who is she again?

Kate: She plays Stephen Hawking’s wife in The Theory of Everything.

 

Jennifer Aniston

sags 2015 jennifer aniston

Kate: I like this green even more than I like Claire Danes’ green — yay green!

Erica: Yeah? I like neither green. Also, hello, boobs.

Kate: That necklace is very Covet IRL. (No one else knows what that means, but that’s ok.)

Erica: I need more people to know what that means. I need more closets to borrow from.

Kate: Hey loyal Fashion Police blog post readers — download Covet and let Erica and I borrow from your closets! Thanks in advance.

 

Joanne Froggatt

sags 2015 joanne froggatt

Kate: It takes very specifically shaped and sized boobs to pull off those pointy cup things. (Very technical fashion term.) I love the dress, and I adore her hair.

Erica: Again, is this reading as black or as midnight blue on the telecast? In black? Elegant and lovely. In midnight blue? ALL THE GOLD STARS, JOANNE FROGGATT. And I’m sorry I don’t watch your show anymore. You’re fabulous; the whole crew is fabulous. I just could not handle the emotion.

Kate: It sometimes looked black and sometimes looked very dark grey and also sometimes looked midnight blue, so I am really not sure. I may be a bit biased toward her red carpet looks now because I know Brad Goreski styles her.

Erica: Who in the what now?

Kate: Brad Goreski was Rachel Zoe’s assistant way back when and then he had his own show on Bravo and now he replaced George Kotsiopoulos on Fashion Police. Duh! (I adore him.)

 

Julia Roberts

sags 2015 julia roberts

Kate: Smokin’.

Erica: I love that “I’m Julia Roberts; I do not have to give a f*ck!” look. It gives her a very special glow.

Kate: THIS is how you do “menswear”, Emma Stone! Take notes!

Erica: To be fair, I think Emma Stone’s dress was going for something completely different. I feel I should mention Julia’s hair, because it looks fabu, but there’s some breaking news for you: “Julia Roberts’ Hair: Fabulous!”

 

Julianna Margulies

sags 2015 julianna margulies

Kate: Fab fab fab fab color. You know I love that royal blue, especially on us dark-haired ladies.

Erica: My computer screen doesn’t even know how to handle that color. It’s pixel-shocked! (That is a compliment. I love the color.)

Kate: Hairstyle is a little too casual for me, and I don’t know how I feel about the skirt in and of itself, but it works for her. Also great makeup.

Erica: I can’t see anything but that color. Good job there.

 

Julianne Moore

sags 2015 julianne moore Kate: She is one of very few people who can actually pull off this color.

Erica: It is a classic green for the redheaded ladies. And it’s a classic for a reason.

Kate: I do not so much love the actual dress itself, but she overall looks very good.

Erica: I think the dress is very pretty but could use some structuring in the bodice area. But she looks fantastic.

 

Julia Louis-Dreyfus

sags 2015 julia louis-dreyfus

Kate: Oooh she’s giving me a little Elaine Benes here!

Erica: Yeah? Because the hair?

Kate: Yes, I love that she did her hair curly. I very much like this dress, but her makeup is a tad lackluster. And it takes a lot for me to say that because I love her so much.

Erica: I like the hair. I like the dress. I agree with the makeup, but this is another event where I feel like we’re seeing a lot of too much makeup and a lot of not enough make-up. Maybe it’s just the sun? Or lack of sun? Whatever the weather is doing to the lighting in LA?

Kate: Or all these HD cameras and HD TVs picking up what people’s faces actually really look like?

 

Julie Bowen

sags 2015 julie bowen

Erica: I kind of like this?

Kate: This is something we have come to expect from Julie Bowen, so it’s fine, but I like how she made her hair a little edgier than usual. No?

Erica: I think this is a lot better than we usually get from her, in that it doesn’t look ill-fitting or like something a crazy person would wear and it’s not a dreadful color. And yeah, I like her hair. But I know she’s messing with me. I know she’s setting me up, giving me a false sense of security so she can really wham me over the head with whatever she’s got cooked up next.

 

Keira Knightley

sags 2015 keira knightley

Kate: Leaps and bounds better than her STUPID Golden Globes dress, but still not all that impressive.

Erica: Is she sporting a bump?

Kate: Yes, she is confirmed pregnant. It’s a great color, obviously one that I like, but it has weird stringy things around the sleeve area, and that half-up hairdo is how I wear my hair to work when it’s dirty or just weirdly wavy. It doesn’t look bad, it just doesn’t look red carpet-y.

Erica: I do love the color, and I love the lace, and since she is pregnant, I love the shape, but if she were not, then that front ruffle would be a little bit of a problem. But you’re right, it doesn’t look red carpet-y. If you got rid of the mesh inset and shortened the whole thing to the knee, it’d make a lovely summer frock. You could even keep the sleeve ties then. But as a red carpet gown, it is not great.

Laverne Cox

sags 2015 laverne cox

Kate: So I get this look for her, like I get it, but it’s not properly tailored. I see actual wrinkles and gaping in the material that shouldn’t be there.

Erica: Even if it were properly tailored, it would be very pageant-y. Although I guess that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

Kate: Interestingly enough, I like her hair? Am I losing it?

Erica: Yes. Yes, I think you might be.

Kate: I accept that.

 

Maggie Gyllenhaal

sags 2015 maggie gyllenhaal

Erica: This makes her look very boxy.

Kate: I am not feeling this at all. Why are these celebrities so into squishing their boobs into submission with these dresses?

Erica: I think she has a weird relationship with her boobs. They never look right in the red carpet gowns she chooses.

 

Maisie Williams

sags 2015 maisie williams

Kate: Adorable!

Erica: I love love love the dress. I am not big on the gothy makeup or the messy hair.

Kate: A bit too sexy though with the boobs? How old is she IRL?

Erica: I just checked; she’ll be eighteen soon. I think this is perfectly appropriate for an almost-eighteen-year-old.

 

Meryl Streep

sags 2015 meryl streep

Kate: So Meryl.

Erica: Continuing to not give a f*ck.

Kate: I just love that I worry about wearing my (new) glasses to a friend’s party at her apartment, and Meryl wears her glasses to red carpet events, like, all the time.

Erica: She is a boss b*tch. She does not have to give a f*ck. Hey, look here!

sags 2015 meryl and julia

Erica: TWO boss b*tches who do not give a f*ck! One with great acting chops, the other with great hair, both with that golden glow that career security and not giving a f*ck lends to one’s skin!

Kate: When I saw that they were sitting at the same table, I was like, “Yup”.

 

Naomi Watts

 sags 2015 naomi watts

Kate: Eh.

Erica: Midnight or black?

Kate: Definitely midnight, this one. Boring, wrinkly. I need something else from her hair; I’m over the deep side part.

Erica: Whatever, she’s pretty and she looks fine. And if it’s midnight, I’m in favor. I love midnight, and I REALLY love midnight on the fair-haired.

 

Natalie Dormer

sags 2015 natalie dormer

Kate: Erm…

Erica: You know what? I like it. It’s girly and it’s silly and it’s fun and it’s not boring.

Kate: The dress is OK, but something about it just isn’t doing it for me. What’s really throwing me off is the fact that a) her hair is the same color as her face, and b) that hair looks like it was braided when it was wet the night before and the braids were taken out just before she got out of the limo.

Erica: Okay, I do not like the hair. She looks much better as a brunette and those eyes and cat-like face are better shown off in an updo.

 

Rashida Jones

sags 2015 rashida jones

Kate: Fun! Not my personal style, but super fun on her. She’s so tan.

Erica: Ooh cute. I really, really like it. Like Keira Knightley’s, you could cut it off at the knees and have a fun summer dress, but unlike Keira Knightley’s, it still looks red carpet-y in its current incarnation. And I love the pop of red lip!

Kate: Ian loves her.

Erica: I approve of him more and more every day.

 

Reese Witherspoon

sags 2015 reese witherspoon

Kate: Ooooh I love a bouncy Reese ponytail.

Erica: It does look cute. The blush is a bit much.

Kate: I loved her Golden Globes dress so much and I don’t understand why no one else did, and I love this just as much. I SEE YOU, REESE! I SEE YOU!

Erica: I feel like you and she would get along really well.

Kate: I don’t know why we’re not besties yet.

 

Sarah Hyland

sags 2015 sarah hyland

Kate: This is a fun sparkly young dress that I don’t hate, but her face frightens me. It was more obvious on the pre-show than in this picture, but her face is soooo heavily made up and her eyes so bugged out of her head to the point where it looked like she was about to pop a blood vessel.

Erica: I like the dress. I like the layers of translucent black over a nude underskirt. and it’s tailored well, at least as far as I can see. I’ll have to take your word for it on the makeup. In pics it looks good.

 

Sofia Vergara

sags 2015 sofia vergara

Erica: It’s not that I wish this dress were a different color. I just wish the carpet were a different color. But then it wouldn’t be a red carpet.

Kate: I am finally off the I-hate-Sofia-Vergara bandwagon. I’m not sure why or when it happened, but I am. I think she looks very lovely. Also I would like to borrow that dress, if only she would tell me how that left boob stayed covered and supported.

Erica: There is some serious support in that bodice. That is structured out the wazoo. Yes, she does look very nice tonight.

Kate: I do, however, prefer her hair bouncy and voluminous instead of pin-straight, and I feel like she wears the same earrings to every red carpet event. That is all!

 

Uzo Aduba

sags 2015 Uzo Aduba

Erica: Oh, dear.

Kate: Mmmm, nope. Not good. Crochet = inappropriate for red carpet. Yellow crochet = inappropriate for everything.

Erica: I mean, she deserves every acting award and accolade she gets. And her bod is something fierce. But this dress. This dress. Well, at least it’s not boring.

 

Viola Davis

sags 2015 viola davis

Kate: Beautiful dress, but not for her.

Erica: Yeah? I feel it’s a little young for her, but not too young. And I love bright white on dark skin.

Kate: I think it’s too bright, I didn’t consider the age-appropriateness of it. I do not like her hair that way, and she looked extraordinarily unhappy to be there.

Erica: Her hair I am not overly fond of. But she did? I saw a nice quote from her acceptance speech?

Kate: She looked unhappy to be on the red carpet, then she won, so I’m sure she felt better. So, best dressed?

Erica: I don’t know. I think my personal fave is Rashida, although that doesn’t mean she’s the best, it just means she’s the most appealing to me. If Joanne Froggatt’s dress is midnight and not black, then for sure her. If it’s black, she’s still a top contender. Although maybe the total preciousness of Felicity Jones should be considered? Or Danielle Brooks for being so on point and exactly what you should look like while walking the red carpet?

Kate: I was thinking Felicity Jones, but shoot let’s give it to Taystee! YAY TAYSTEE GIRL! Worst dressed?

Erica: Man. I don’t want to do this. I don’t. I love her acting and I think she deserves a ton of recognition. But Uzo. I mean. That dress is just awful. It’s just awful.

Kate: Uzo’s dress is not good, but it doesn’t offend me like Emma Stone’s, so I’m giving it to her. Ok people, catch us after the Grammys!

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Golden Globes 2015

Kate: And we’re BACK with the 2015 award show season! WEEEEEE!

Erica: Oh boy oh boy oh boy.

Kate: I am a tad upset that I haven’t seen enough of the nominated films. I tried to see The Theory of Everything Saturday and it was sold out…At 2 p.m. What the h?

Erica: Me, I have become very accustomed to the notion of having seen none of the nominated movies.

Kate: And away we go!

Allison Williams

Kate: Sooo she was upset about the mess that was Peter Pan live on NBC and went straight to the nearest Christmas store and wrapped herself in red tree skirts and said, “This is what I’m wearing to the first award show this year, guys!”.

Erica: That was a serious mess, yo. The Peter Pan thing, I mean.

Kate: This dress, too. She is a lovely human being, but this is absurd. Completely absurd.

Amal Clooney

Kate: I know she’s not nominated or presenting, but we have to include the new Mrs. Clooney, right?

Erica: Absolutely.

Kate: She is related to Anne Hathaway, right?

Erica: What? Really?

Kate: I just feel like they are twinsies. She just looks freaking perfect. In addition to looking perfect, she looks completely over this whole thing, and completely over Giuliana Rancic’s crush on George. She’s so European.

Erica: Yeah, their whole thing is like a romance novel in real life. Well, real-ish life.

Amy Adams

Kate: So I actually love this dress, and I feel like it’s a surprising dress for me to love because of the color. I do not love the color against her pale skin and red hair, but the style is soooo me. Like, I have that dress in a darker blue and shorter. So that overrides the color thing.

Erica: I actually like the color on her just fine. And I like the color in general. But I don’t understand what this movie is.

Kate: Her hair could have been a bit more “wow” — she could have gone for wavier waves — but overall this is a lovely, if very safe, choice for her.

Erica: I thought it was safe from the front, but I loved it from the back when she came up to get her award. Congrats, Amy!

Amy Poehler

Kate: So I love the first dress color. I love it. Power blue, all about it. But the silhouette is so unflattering on her, and the high neckline mixed with the mini-version of Naomi Watts’ necklace (see below) is a terrible combination.

Erica: Is Amy Poehler pregnant? Because, if not, yeah, that’s a really unflattering silhouette. And even if she’s not. Because why must she wear such high necks all the time?

Kate: I thought that, too! She’s not pregnant, though. I just read her book and am filled with all sorts of love for her, and I know she has costume changes throughout the night, so I won’t completely rip this apart.

Erica: Do you have the book? Can I borrow it?

Kate: Sure. What was even the point of wearing that blue dress? Her next one, the purple one, is so much better! It looks fab on her! Keep that on, Amy!

Erica: Yeah? I like it better but I’m sort of bored. Still.

Kate: Third look is ok, second one is still winning for me.

Erica: I will go with that.

Anna Faris

Kate: Super cute! Tailored yet loose fit, good amount of sparkle, great hair and makeup and subtle jewelry.

Erica: It’s so grown up for her. Makeup is perfect.

Kate: This might be a best dressed nominee for me.

Anna Kendrick

Kate: ER this is so similar to that one Covet dress, except longer!

Erica: I so very much love this. I don’t think I’ve ever really loved her on the red carpet before. (I love her in terms of acting and singing and all.) This is dreamy.

Kate: So pretty. It’s not my favorite of the night, but she looks fantastic.

Erica: It might be mine.

Claire Danes

Kate: Angelllaaaaa.

Erica: I mean, I don’t love it, but it’s very her and in a good way. Previously she’s been very her in a bad way.

Kate: She must be over the whole Homeland/award show thing because this dress so obviously says, “I don’t care about anything happening right now”.

Erica: I think “I don’t care” looks kinda good on her.

Ellie Kemper

Kate: I love! But…Have we seen this before? Like, on her?

Erica: Bra! Which I feel like I say to her a lot.

Emily Blunt

Kate: YAS! YAS YAS YASSSSS!

Erica: Oh excuse me, I thought someone hated braids?

Kate: Michael Kors made this for her, which is super nice, but he actually made it for me because after the show Emily is dropping it off at my apartment so that I can wear this to the wedding (as dress #2/reception dress, obviously).

Erica: Didn’t we discuss the little midriff cut-out thing with respect to bridesmaid dresses? Totes inapprops for a wedding. But she does look crazy fantastic.

Kate: The turquoise earrings are the perfect accent to the white — a bit beachy, but that’s ok because they’re in California — and her makeup is always good. Yes, I normally hate that hairstyle, on and off the red carpet, but I appreciate that it’s a nod to her Into the Woods character, even though I didn’t like the movie. Oh man I love this dress.

Emma Stone

Erica: She’s hilarious.

Kate: I love this.

Erica: I am okay with it? Her hair looks good.

Kate: Hold on, hold ON. Those are pants. I thought this was a dress. But those are pants. This is a jumpsuit on the red carpet, with a big bow on the back. Minus the bow, it is actually one of my elementary school dance costumes, so I take it back: I DO NOT LOVE THIS.

Erica: Yeah! I remember that costume! Mom was totally flummoxed about underwear. Wait, hold up, she’s in Cabaret on Broadway right now?

Kate: Yeah, where have you been, not in New York? 😦

Erica: You think you’re sad? Imagine how I feel.

Felicity Jones

Kate: I am including this newcomer because I really want to see her movie, and I think her dress is extremely interesting.

Erica: What movie is she in? I like it. I like the color, I like the shape, I like that she kept the hair simple and the makeup very girlish and natural.

Kate: The Theory of Everything, about Steven Hawking, which I tried to see Saturday at 2 p.m. The color is fairly unique for the red carpet, I think, and the structure and detail is amazing — a bit 19th century, in a good way, no? I feel like this is a very you dress, Er.

Erica: Well, thank you, Kate.

Kate: I mean that in a good way!

Heidi Klum

Kate: Hot damn.

Erica: I mean, she looks hot, as always, but the dress isn’t a little pageanty?

Kate: I feel like it’s not fair to give someone like Heidi Klum best dressed, but she looks phenomenal.

Erica: Well, she started by being Heidi Klum, so that helps.

Jenna Dewan-Tatum

Kate: I wouldn’t normally include her because I’ll always hate her for marrying Channing Tatum, but — and this pains me — I like the dress too much to ignore it.

Erica: Yeah? I mean, I like the drapeyness.

Kate: It’s the right yellow, you know? And a lovely strapless swoopy silhouette.

Erica: It is a good yellow on her, although not with that hair color.

Kate: I do think her hair is too dark in general. But when they arrived on the red carpet you could see Channing help her fix her hair and blow an eyelash off her face and it was just so cute I couldn’t stand it.

Erica: I was gonna say her hair looks a little dark. I like it when stars go dark — I’m a fan of brunettes — but you have to make sure there’s, you know, tones and highlights and whatnot so it doesn’t look so flat.

Jennifer Aniston

Kate: I love that BUN! Oh my oh my I love that bun. Can that be my wedding hair bun?

Erica: It’s quite lovely. I would go a little lower. For your wedding, I mean, not for Jennifer Aniston.

Kate: The dress is nice but does slightly weird things to her boobs, and the earrings are just a touch too long for that neckline. But it’s been a while since she was at an award show because she was actually nominated, so overall I think she looks swell.

Erica: I actually think that, for that neckline, her boobs look pretty good. Did you see that slit when she walked up to the stage? Holy moly, man.

Kate: Additionally, she seemed to be in a fairly foul mood all night. Why do we think that is?

Erica: Really? I was watching her with Carson; she seemed alright.

Jennifer Lopez

Kate: Oh that is just so JLo.

Erica: Seriously.

Kate: The hair, the CAPE, the jewelry that is basically cut from the dress. So. J. Lo.

Erica: It’s almost like she is afraid we’ll forget who she is. I must say I like her hair.

Kate: Hah, me too.

Jessica Chastain

Kate: Va-va-voom, Jessica!

Erica: Holy moly. Has she ever done the Jessica Rabbit thing before?

Kate: I do feel like this is a combination of Meryl Streep’s 2012 Oscar dress and Angelina Jolie’s 2012 SAG dress, but that combination looks very good and sexy on her.

Erica: Have we been doing this too long?

Kate: Never!

Joanne Froggatt

Erica: More braids! Happy for me, sad for you?

Kate: I don’t watch Downton Abbey so I don’t know who this lady is, but I really like her dress. I like Emily’s braid better.

Erica: I don’t really watch it. Jason does. I got too emotionally invested and had to stop. But yes, I like her dress and I like her overall gratitude and obviously her accent.

Julia Louis-Dreyfus

Kate: My girl!

Erica: This is not my favorite on her. In general I like her better in her business suits on her show than on the red carpet.

Kate: It’s a little pageanty, but I don’t particularly care. She’s showing off that fabulous tan and that fabulous body, and rightfully so.

Erica: Her hair looks good. And her shoulders are fantastic.

Kate: Her everything is fantastic.

Julianne Moore

Kate: Ok, this is Gwyneth Paltrow’s 2011 Oscar dress re-cut with some feathers added to the bottom. Which is not to say it’s not a great dress/doesn’t look great on her, but that’s what this is.

Erica: Gwyneth’s was better. I say this while adoring Julianne Moore and not particularly feeling one way or another about Gwyneth.

Kate: Everyone seems to be doing that deep-side-parted, semi-wavy hair, though.

Kate Beckinsdale

Erica: Well, yes.

Kate: It’s just not fair that there is a human on this planet who looks like that.

Erica: It’s really not. And she gets to have that accent, too.

Kate: I also think she maybe borrowed this from JLo.

Erica: It’s definitely on the sexy end of things she wears.

Kate Hudson

Kate: Jesus H. Christ her body is absolutely insane.

Erica: She hasn’t aged at all.

Kate: I don’t even like this dress that much, but it looks so good on her, you know? She does wear white a little too often.

Erica: It does look like a very Kate Hudson dress.

Kate: When she arrived on the red carpet she ran over to Jennifer Aniston to say hi, and then they were interviewed back to back and were excited to see each other again, and I didn’t know those two were friends, so I thought that was kind of adorable.

Erica: I’m not sure why, but that makes total sense to me. That those two are friends.

Kate Mara

Kate: Hold on, are she and Kevin Spacey dating IRL? He was very handsy with her during his Ryan Seacrest interview (when he claimed to be wearing JoS. A. Bank, which was hilarious).

Erica: They cannot be dating. Can they? He’s old enough to be her grandfather.

Kate: Well, it’s a good color on her and I always love the way she does her makeup, but the hair is weird and the BELT? THE ORANGE BELT? Come on.

Erica: There is speculation on the internet right now that maybe they’re dating. So, they were not known to be dating before but everyone else is noticing the extreme not-just-friends demeanor of these two tonight. Ugh. Gross.

Katherine Heigl

Erica: Wow, she looks good.

Kate: Because it’s navy and structured it’s a bit too businessy for me, but I like how her hair is loose and sexy in contrast. Overall pretty good, Isobel Stevens! (I’m re-watching Grey’s. Terrible [wonderful] idea.)

Erica: Businessy? I feel like nothing with that neckline can be described as businessy. And I like navy, especially on blondes.

Katie Holmes

Erica: I love that color, both on her and in general.

Kate: Good, because that’s one of the wedding colors! But her side pony upsets me because it’s so obviously fake.

Erica: The side ponytail — I mean, why have a fake side ponytail when a side ponytail is not really a great formal look? Also, earrings.

Kate: Actually, she kind of looks like a bridesmaid. Which doesn’t mean she looks bad — hey, I want my bridesmaids to look fabulous — but she just doesn’t look like she’s on the red carpet.

Erica: Agreed.

Keira Knightley

Kate: Oh come on now.

Erica: Look, it’s obvious what’s happening here.

Kate: Is that a bib? And are those BIRDS on her dress? BIRDS?

Erica: No, butterflies. But come on, Kate. She’s punking us.

Kate: This is just a big fat NO for me.

Kerry Washington

Erica: I can’t make up my mind.

Kate: I can: NOPE. Not cute.

Erica: I don’t know, I think it kind of is cute? I mean, it’s not boring, and the silhouette is cool, and I’m not so in love with the side panels and it’s making complete pancakes of her boobs, but her hair and makeup look good?

Kate: Not cute at all. I am officially anti-Kerry Washington on the red carpet, and I would like everyone else to just get over her with me.

Lena Dunham

Erica: I mean, this is one of the best from her. Great color.

Kate: What she has done to her bangs makes her face look quite scary, and the too-dark makeup job doesn’t help.

Erica: I’m not disagreeing. Actually, I’d be fine with her eye makeup if she had a little bronzer or something. And I like the color of her hair right now.

Kate: The color of the dress is nicer on her skin tone than her usual choices, but the fit is not right. It looks like a tent, but not like it’s supposed to look like a tent. Can we not afford a quick alteration or two?

Erica: Yeah, there needs to be some structure in the torso there.

Lorde

Kate: Hey look, there’s a human person underneath all that wacky hair!

Erica: I’m so out of it, I’m not even sure what you’re talking about with the hair.

Kate: She actually looks very nice. Separately I’m against pantsuits and midriff-baring tops, ESPECIALLY on the red carpet, but this whole thing together looks sleek and glamorous (minus the silly face she is making in this photo).

Erica: Yeah. I mean, she’s a young, alternative musician, so from her, I accept pants and midriff.

Lupita Nyong’o

Erica: Oh my goodness that is some craziness.

Kate: I feel like this dress is very her, and the purple is very fun, but it’s not WOWING me at all. I don’t really like her hair more grown out like that.

Erica: I feel like only she in the whole entire world can pull that dress off. I do not like it, but I appreciate its nuttiness and she looks very nice in it. Plus, can we talk about her arm and shoulder situation?

Kate: She actually looked adorable in her glasses when presenting!

Erica: She really did.

Maggie Gyllenhaal

Erica: She looks nice.

Kate: Great color on her, but overall a pretty boring dress.

Erica: I like the structure. I mean, I like it on her. I don’t love it as a general rule.

Melissa McCarthy

Erica: Feh.

Kate: I should hate this, but I totally don’t. She has worn the same three dresses to award shows for the past few years, and this is something fun and different and very I-wear-what-I-want. I think she looks great.

Erica: I think the dress is feh. I like her hair. I’m sort of liking the makeup.

Meryl Streep

Kate: I didn’t think Meryl was in attendance because she didn’t do the red carpet, and I don’t even have a photo for her, but she snuck in there in her fab glasses and classic black-and-white dress with a half-cape. Oh, Meryl!

Erica: I think she kind of doesn’t do red carpet.

Kate: And she was the FIRST person to stand up during the HFPA president’s speech. Oh, Meryl!

Michelle Monaghan

Kate: Ugh, I wanted more from her. This is, like, baggy and dull. Meh.

Erica: She is itsy-bitsy. This is also going to sound mean, but I’m going to say it anyway: She’s pretty in a very regular-girl way, but she doesn’t even remotely look like a movie star. Or TV star, or whatever.

Naomi Watts

Kate: I just feel like the whole snake jewelry thing, as well as the whole yellow dress thing, is so been-there-done-that.

Erica: I am with you on the dress. Yellow is not her color and I don’t know why she persists in believing it is. But I kind of like the necklace. I mean, it’s silly, but I like it.

Kate: The silhouette is very nice on her, but I think I’d like the whole thing more without the snake. It’s just too much.

Erica: I think the silhouette is boring. I will say she is aging incredibly gracefully.

Reese Witherspoon

Kate: Perfection.

Erica: I have to be honest. I’m a little…Bored.

Kate: But you’re wrong. It’s the exact right kind of sparkle, perfectly tailored to her gorgeous body, great hair and jewelry and makeup — best dressed nominee.

Erica: I mean, she looks very nice. I’m not saying she doesn’t. And I didn’t know she and Mindy Kaling were friends. That’s cool.

Kate: I also very much like the dress on Cheryl Strayed (Reese’s date) as a simple, elegant, I’m-the-author-of-a-book-that-was-turned-into-a-nominated-movie look.

Taylor Schilling

Kate: Eh…No. The top cuts her weird in some areas from some angles, and I feel like on the red carpet you need something that looks good from every angle, and the skirt is just bad. It’s also a very blah red.

Erica: Oh, I like the red, but I agree that it looks like the dress might not be cut really well.

Kate: I do love a sleek low bun, which is the other main hairstyle of the evening (or afternoon, for them).

Erica: I want yours somewhere between Jennifer Aniston’s and this one.

Kate: For the wedding, or for when I am finally nominated for a Golden Globe?

Tina Fey

Kate: Look #1 is not doing it for me — it’s a jeweled, strapless French maid outfit! Diggin’ the slightly poofed high pony, though.

Erica: That skirt is unfortunate.

Kate: I will give her the same pass I gave Amy because I know they have more than one look tonight.

Erica: Well, her second dress isn’t any better.

Kate: The second dress is just the first look just reconfigured? And I like the hair less. Come on, Tina!

Erica: Oh, I kind of like the second hair. Whatever. These ladies are hysterical. Who cares what they wear?

Kate: WE DO! The third look is silly and great, and probably my favorite of the night (for her).

Erica: Yes. I am enjoying it the most. She looks really adorable like that.

Kate: So, best dressed?

Erica: I mean, I’m really into Anna Kendricks’ princess look. I could go Emily Blunt, though.

Kate: Let’s agree on Emily Blunt, then! Worst dressed?

Erica: I mean, I’m a little inclined to give it to Keira Knightley, but I think she’s punking us, so I’m not sure we should. I might give it to Melissa McCarthy. I don’t like to, because I understand that formal wear for larger ladies is difficult, but I really hated it.

Kate: Nope, let’s go with Keira. Folks, catch us next month for the OSCARS! Yay!