Erica: Sorry about the delay this week, guys. This is one of about 20 things I SWORE I would get done BEFORE leaving for Vegas. Which is where we are now. I am writing this from the plush velvet couch in our lovely room at the Palazzo at 6:00 in the morning because my kids haven’t adjusted for the time difference.
Kate: Yea, we have LIVES, guys. (I also forgot to watch Monday and Tuesday night.)
Erica: And for those of you keeping track at home, two will be eliminated tonight and then I guess next week is the finale because Fox wants to get this show done already. Listen, Fox, you are wrong and this show is delightful but why you gotta play things like this?
Kate: It used to be delightful, but I have to admit it has lost a good chunk of its charm for me.
Erica: And, as ever, there will be solos, but we will not cover them.
Cat Deeley’s Ensemble
Kate: Good hair. Bad makeup.
Erica: Her hair looks great. The dress is not my thing but it’s fine I guess.
Kate: I’m just not into prints like that. The silvery-smoky makeup is too matchy-matchy with the dress, and the shoes don’t go at all. I know they’re black, but they just don’t go. Ugh, I am so mean!
Erica: Are we covering the other ladies? Because Hudgy looks strange but it’s not her stupidest outfit. And Mary looks like she’s wearing your maiden aunt’s nightgown from 1972. I say this with love, Mary Murphy. With love.
Zoe: Mary Murphy’s outfit isn’t bad this week.
Erica: Well, we all have our own opinions.
Kate: I have hated every single “look” of Vanessa Hudgy’s on every single episode of this season. It looks like her face is painted actual red. That is an accurate description of Mary’s outfit, Er, and it makes sense that you don’t think it’s bad, Zoe. (Love you.)
Group Routine (All): Contemporary, choreo by Christopher Scott
“Prism” by Nathan Lanier
Erica: So, as a routine, I thought it was pretty neat. The boys were in all black and started the routine with these white boxes, which, I know, props are annoying, but I didn’t think these were a bad use of props. Then they rather spectacularly revealed the girls in white. And the routine was very sharp and precise and cool. But the dancers were not as sharp as they needed to be. The choreo was great; the dancers were not all living up to it.
Kate: I loved the concept — very synchronized swimming without the water. The sharpness has been an issue this entire season; like, seasons 1-5 judges/voters would NEVER have stood for this low level of sharpness.
Erica: There was an especially telling moment where Cyrus and Fik-Shun were doing the same thing, and Cyrus looked 180 times as sharp as Fik-Shun did.
Kate: Yes, I am becoming more and more pro-Cyrus than I ever was during his season.
Lex & Gaby: Samba, choreo by Sasha Farber
“Chillando Goma” by Fulanito
Erica: I am super into her outfit. There’s these really colorful tassels on her skirt and I am in favor.
Kate: I was really into this routine, more so than usual for these two, but I can’t help but wish two REALLY GOOD ballroom dancers had performed it instead. Cool tricks, though.
Erica: Was this sort of African-jazz-inflected samba? I felt like with those flexed-wrist-and-ankle it was. And then Mary Murphy backed me up there. So I know things now.
Kate: That’s kind of what it felt like at first, but then it went mostly into samba.
Erica: I thought it was fine. Fun and wild. But not particularly sexy, as they were saying it was supposed to be in the rehearsal footage.
Kate: …And then Nigel told Lex to go and take some ballroom lessons before the tour? Ouch! (Also, HOW MANY TIMES CAN THEY PROMOTE THE DAMN TOUR IN ONE EPISODE? I went once, and it was super-cool, but come on guys.)
Koine & Marko: Contemporary, choreo by Mandy Korpinen & Elizabeth Petrin
“You’re the Last Thing On My Mind” by Aron Wright
Erica: So this was a routine centered around this big closet set piece and that was making all of the Jewish mother instincts I have in me scream “No! Get off that! Stop it!”
Kate: Haha. (Real laugh.)
Erica: I thought there were some really beautiful moves — like when they were both hanging from the hanger with their legs entangled — but it didn’t cohere for me. It felt like a series of moves as opposed to a dance. That’s more about the choreo than the dancing. Koine, as ever, was gorgeous and perfect.
Kate: Yes, it was very heavy on the acting/tricks/props more so than the dancing, but I am a sucker for super-emo contemporary to slow songs about sad relationships. So sue me.
Ian: I feel like you and I could do this on the playground, but the judges are going to say it’s incredible.
Erica: And then Nigel has to be gross to Koine and women in general, and insulting to Mary Murphy, by speculating that he would like to hang a piece of lingerie in his closet and get a beautiful woman but with his luck he’d probably get a Mary Murphy. You so wish, Nigel. Shut up.
Zoe: Taylor’s solo was pretty amazing, but it had a pretty weird outfit in an awful color.
Kate: Zoe, we’re not covering solos! But you’re right, it’s like someone cut up a bridesmaid dress (in not that awful a color?) and made it into a dance costume.
Kiki & Jenna: Jazz, choreo by Ray Leeper
“Proud Mary” by Tina Turner
Kate: Such a fun song, but it would lend itself better to a bigger group routine.
Erica: I did not see one second of this dance because Sadie was dancing next to me on the couch and for one thing I had to prevent her from falling off but also it was SO DAMN CUTE YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW.
Kate: Next time, film it!
Zoe: Jenna’s outfit is really sparkly and I like that but it’s also a little weird-looking.
Kate: It’s very Tina.
Erica: The few moves I did see looked like the moves everyone ever does to “Proud Mary,” so way to phone it in, there, Ray Leeper.
Kate: Yes, Ian was extremely upset about this routine and this show overall, I won’t even include all of his very angry comments. Her stupid facial expressions were very distracting, and he looked a bit unsure of himself. Fun, but not great. PS Jenna totally said “Ray Leeter” instead of “Ray Leeper” and that made me feel really good about myself.
Kaylee & Cyrus: Hip-hop, choreo by Phillip Chbeeb
“Die Trying” by Michl
Erica: For a minute I thought this was another piece with a prop to make me nervous. But they didn’t stand it up so that was good. Kind of stupid for the live audience, but good for my heart.
Kate: They were SUPER prop-happy this week. I love these two.
Erica: I continue to be impressed by her attitude. I could not tell why this was hip-hop and not jazz but it was cool and well-performed.
Zoe: LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!!
Kate: Me too, Zoe! Love all your commentary this week. You sat and watched with Mommy the whole time, eh?
Erica: But also Sadie started dancing and she was AMAZING. Nigel continues to be a little passive-aggressive to her.
Kate: Nigel is passive-aggressive to Sadie? I’ll kill him.
Group Routine (All-Stars): Contemporary, choreo by Andrew Winghart
“Floreana” by Baauer
Kate: I really didn’t know what to make of this style — they were all wearing pasodoble outfits, but doing some kind of modern-jazz-contemporary mashup. Hey, how come we don’t do “modern” on this show?
Erica: It’s not 100% clear to me what the difference would be between “modern” and “contemporary”. But I don’t think “jazz” is really its own style any more, and “Broadway” hardly means anything at all, so who knows?
Kate: Modern is more flexing, contemporary is more pointing. Of the feet, I mean. The weirdness/annoyingness of the song and the shiny red-and-black skirts were quite distracting, but this was overall ok.
Erica: They gave Jenna a little solo and I hate her so much. I know it’s irrational. Zoe is sitting next to me, going, “You know she’s a pretty good dancer, right?” And I do know. I do. But I hate her. This number was fine but not memorable.
Taylor & Robert: Hip-hop, choreo by Mari & Keone Madrid
“Numb & Getting Colder” by Flume feat. Kucka
Kate: Now HERE was the sharpness I’ve been waiting for. Excellent.
Erica: Oh my goodness. This was cool as anything I’ve seen.
Kate: I thought it was simply perfection. Love these two.
Erica: Love these two. Love the choreo. The wobble they did? The perfectly in sync WOBBLE. Are we kidding? So good.
Zoe: Amazing amazing amazing.
Logan & Allison: Contemporary, choreo by Dee Caspary
“The Other Side” by Ruelle
Kate: It is very hard to believe these two could have a romantic relationship in any routine they’ve done this season, but this is the closest they’ve come so far.
Erica: I’ve always liked Logan, although I acknowledge the chemistry problems between these two. This piece really showed him off perfectly. They were amazing in it.
Kate: The dancing itself was fantastic, very sharp and synchronized. God help me, I liked Hudgy’s description of it: “Sexy Contemporary”.
Erica: But it’s accurate. I also have positive feelings about Dee Caspary, though I’m struggling to remember what specific other routines he’s choreographed that I’ve liked.
Kate: I know we’re not covering solos, but Kiki took his shirt off at the end of his and Mary IMMEDIATELY stood up and started clapping with a VERY happy/satisfied look on her face. It was silly.
Lex & Koine: Disco, choreo by Doriana Sanchez
“Knock On Wood” Amii Stewart
Kate: I don’t know if disco suits these 2, or if these 2 suit each other, because this felt a little off.
Erica: I don’t generally like disco on this show, and I’m not a big Lex fan. I felt a lot of moves looked unfinished and their chemistry and trust were non-existent.
Kate: She was adorable, though, with great legs and lifts and turns, so maybe it was just him?
Erica: I like her a lot. But she was pulling some weird faces here. I kept thinking she was chewing gum. But I still love her. And I think she pulled her weight more than he did.
Kate: Quite awkward when they were talking about his potential injury/Cat was trying to tell him where to go after revealing he was in the top 4/finale, which I am not happy about. WAIT, DORIANA SANCHEZ WAS IN DIRTY DANCING? OMG YES, SHE WAS ONE OF THE FUN DANCE FRIENDS! YAY DORIANA!
Erica: Blergh. I don’t want to yay Doriana. And that was a super-awkward way to handle results. I didn’t like it at all. It was like they were trying to build tension but they flubbed it. And they’ve been doing this too long to flub it.
Taylor & Logan: Jazz, choreo by Mark Kanemura
“Gypsy” by Lady Gaga
Kate: What. Is with. These. Costumes.
Erica: I…Definitely had that outfit in 1995. Or I wanted it.
Kate: Fine, fine, outfits aside, I like him better when he is with her. She is so talented. I can’t decide between her, Koine and Kaylee! Maybe she is the most skilled technically, Koine the funnest, and Kaylee the most interesting/most improved?
Erica: God the three of them are spectacular. I also have to put in another plug for Kaylee’s overall attitude. I love all three of them. Also maybe I like Lady Gaga? Is that okay?
Kiki & Kaylee: Bollywood, choreo by Nakul Dev Mahajan
“Gallan Goodiyaan” by Dil Dhadakne Do (Soundtrack)
Kate: And in what should come as a surprise to no one, Kaylee was very good at Bollywood. Better than Kiki. But he was still good too.
Erica: She brought the joy. She didn’t look like she was acting happy; she looked like she WAS happy.
Kate: You might have Sadie doing cute dances, but Ian danced to this entire song while also making me my nightly cup of sleepy tea, so he called it his “tea dance”, so now I have that in my life.
Erica: That is a pretty amazing thing to have in your life and I also wish you had filmed that.
Kate: Oh my god, I think Nigel made his most inappropriate/racist comment yet: If Kiki doesn’t get picked up by Dancing with the Stars next season, he can always be an Uber driver in Mumbai. !!!!!!
Kate: So Kiki, Lex and Taylor are all in the top 4/finale. I am sad that either Koine or Kaylee is going home.
Erica: I really could do without both Kiki and Lex.
Kate: OH BUT I’M SO HAPPY IT’S KOINE IN THE TOP 4/FINALE! YAY! Good job, Kaylee. Bye, Logan.
Erica: I mean, I like both the people leaving better than I like Kiki or Lex. I GUESS THAT’S WHAT I GET FOR NOT VOTING, HUH?
Kate: Yeah, I usually only vote in the finale. Hypocrite, much?